SAWCE

Rules^[1]To non-lawyers, I apologize for this lawyer humor. Please ignore. To all lawyers, I apologize for this lawyer humor. Please forgive.

3 cans (28 ounces each) Italian plum tomatoes^[2]For some very nuanced info about Tomatoes, click here. – with or without basil, gets blended anyway

1 cup carrots, chopped

½ cup zucchini – or add whatever you have in your kitchen/garden (i.e. squash, mushrooms, all of the above)

½ teaspoon oregano

½ teaspoon nutmeg – yes, you read that correctly^[3]Congratulations, you’ve unlocked “Secret Family Recipe.”

1 tablespoon fresh basil – chop it, mince it, rip it up with your fingers, doesn’t matter

½ pound hot Italian sausage (or mild)

½ pound sweet sausage (or whatever appeals to you at the meat counter –  anything with nutmeg?)

1 pound piece of pork loin/butt/shoulder

2 tablespoons olive oil

1 large onion, minced

3 to 4 cloves garlic – you can use less if you want, but why?

Application

1.     Blend and Season. Pour all tomatoes in blender/food processor. Pulse once or twice, then add all carrots and other veggies you want to hide from your children. If there is too much liquid to fit all in your blender/food processor, blend in batches; it’s all going to the same place. Pour everything in sauce pot. Add 1 cup of water (more or less depending on how big pot is), oregano, basil, and healthy amounts of salt and pepper. Bring to boil, reduce to low.

2.     Boil and Sizzle. While you’re waiting for sauce to boil and/or as it simmers, place sausage links in a skillet big enough to immerse them in water. Bring to a boil and cook, covered, until the surface of the sausages is cloudy, about 3-5 minutes. Remove and drain well, then pat dry with paper towels. Pour the water out of the pan and return the sausage to an oil-slicked skillet over medium-high. Prick sausages all over with a fork to release oil; cook until browned on all sides. Transfer everything into your sauce pot as it simmers.

3.     Sear and Combine. Season the pork with salt^[4]I’ve been told that meat should be salted the night before cooking to really bring out the flavors in whatever dish you’re planning to make. Quite frankly, a lot of my cooking is done on a … Continue reading and pepper. In a large pan (just use the same one as the sausages if big enough) over medium heat, heat oil until it shimmers. Add the pork and brown on all sides, about 5 minutes. Reduce heat to low and add onion and garlic. Cover and cook until the onion is soft, about 5 to 7 minutes, but before your garlic gets too crispy. Transfer everything to your sauce pot.

4.     Leave her alone. Simmer the sauce until the pork is tender, at least 4 hours.^[5]I’ve already googled “How long is too long to simmer sauce?” so you don’t have to. The answer does not exist. To serve, remove meats and then shred the pork and slice the sausages. I like to serve this with tagliatelle, but would also recommend egg noodles or fusilli. You can serve it with spaghetti if you want, but in my opinion, and that of salty Italians everywhere, it doesn’t have enough surface area to serve as the right vehicle for your sawce.^[6]Read more about Pasta shapes/sizes/pretentiousness here.

Whatever, it’s delicious no matter how you eat it.